Tag: Kids

What men want?

What men really want is not yet known. Why always hooked up to the internet, when beautiful wife and kids are waiting? Why so crazy about sports, when day to day issues are piled up? Why so engrossed in world issues, when home matters are unaddressed? Why always like mother’s dishes, despite wife cooking for years? Why gossip more than women and sound not interested when someone wants to talk?

Women are still trying to solve the mysterious ‘mankind’. Here is an insight of what men really want.

Priorities

A man defines himself by what he is, what he does and how much he earns. The remaining matters are rather trivial. Unlike a woman, a man places himself first ahead of the family and kids.

The career is of utmost importance to a man. The office politics and the urge to grow higher in the career consumes most of a man’s thoughts. The busy schedules and unending meetings and work take priority in life. After a while, some men even forget to celebrate the smallest happiness in lives.

Expectations

So, in their busy work and life, what men expect from a women? The basic needs are love and support which women offer. Apart from these two basic needs, food is the next big thing. Laundry and house hold chores are the next. If you can take care of the driving and all other kids related activities, that’s even better.

Basically, men are happy if left alone with their work and personal stuff. They are so self-centered and occupied that they expect straight questions and answers. Men do not engage in long convoluted discussions, which they can not figure out. As it is they are preoccupied with office stuff, so they expect women to be straight and direct in asking demands.

Special Occasions

So, what about special occasions in the family. There are minimum sentiments and the occasions are thought with practical reasoning. As in how much it costs, what others expect or what is the gift and how much is the budget for the occasion.

Some men even forget their own birthdays and family member’s special days. If someone else can take care of these things, it is really good for them.

Fixing

Men are raised to fix things. So, when there is any problem, men think about fixing the issue and taking care the problem does not reappear. Sometimes, women want to just share and do not expect a solution.  But, most men are good at suggesting and fixing stuff as the quality is inbuilt in them.

In fact, men are simple and equally vulnerable and expect a direct conversation. They are not as complex and as confused they actually seem. 🙂

What’s with kids and gifts? How to encourage good behavior?

Kid with a gift

 

A guest offers a gift bag to your kid. The kid takes it. He may or may not offer a thank you. You have to remind him to say it. Next, the kid tears open the gift right in front of the guest. You and the guest are shocked. Next, the kid says to the guest he already has it and he does not like it. Now, the guest and you are embarrassed and totally clue less what to do.

Kids think it is alright to behave and say what they want. To some extent, parents do encourage kids to be independent and not to be afraid in any circumstances. But, parents need to explain the difference between being independent and being rude. The basic manners of being courteous, kind and nice to others must not be forgotten while emphasizing independence.

Every kid is different and may need different disciplining style.  Here are some tips and best practices to encourage good behavior when presented with gifts:

  • Reminding the rules of receiving guests. Saying ‘Hello’, ‘How are you’
  • Responding to the guests questions. Saying ‘Thank you’, ‘I’m fine’
  • Looking in to the guests face directly while they are talking
  • Waiting until the conversation is complete
  • Listening actively to the conversation
  • Taking permission from the parents or guests
  • Saying ‘Thank you’ for the gift
  • Being polite and attentive all the time

The kids have to be taught that the gift has to be opened only after the guest leaves or only after coming home. They can express their view about the gift but not in front of the guest. Parents must emphasize that the guest has spend lot of money and time to buy the gift and the guest has shown lot of love and affection by buying the gift.

If the kid does not like the gift, it is better to say, ‘Thank you’ and ‘It is good that you thought of me’. This way the kid will  not be lying and at the same time not hurting the guest. It is important to show the kids to maintain smooth tone and polite language along with the body language. If the kid makes any rude comment, parents have to immediately ask to rephrase the statement with a polite comment.

The same rules hold good with respect to return gifts too. Rude behavior can be stopped by increasing the awareness, modeling and practice. It is also important to maintain positive reinforcement for good behavior and negative reinforcement for rude behavior.